I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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