I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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