Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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