well you can't waste a boner
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.