I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I showed him my bush... on skype.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
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