What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
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