i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaÃt comercial?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize