I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You ruined the universe
false alarm, still single
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
