brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
