Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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