Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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