Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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