My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize