I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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