all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
