Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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