She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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