No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
