Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
