just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Randomize