youre lurking in front of me
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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