It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
