you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
