i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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