There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
dude. I can hear the air.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
