My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
