so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
