did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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