im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
