i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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