i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
