i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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