; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
