hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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