i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I need to sanitize my soul.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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