It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
