she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
