I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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