dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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