i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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