You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
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He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
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Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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