just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
