I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
