I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
