He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm at about main and main street
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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