I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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