Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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