You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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