terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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