Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We have so much sex to catch up on
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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