the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
